AKA the cunning linguist; AKA el lingüista astuto; AKA Thomas the Tongue Engine; AKA le linguiste adroit; AKA il linguista abile; AKA the cunning linguist; AKA el lingüista astuto; AKA Thomas the Tongue Engine; AKA le linguiste adroit; AKA il linguista abile;

Tuesday, 28 February 2012

Stress and Performance (or non)

The stress of work and (extended) family life impacts blog writing just as much as sexual performance.  My next major post, "Cunnilingus 101" has been in the "Draft" folder for a couple of weeks.  But you will understand that writing this blog is not something I can settle down with on the sofa to do, in front of the TV with the family.  And you readers will also understand that the occasional free hour or two will get priority for stress relief over blog writing.  Besides, writing on such a weighty subject, one can never do too much research.

So be patient, I haven't forgotten my blog readers, I'm just in a bit of a slow patch.

(PS. perhaps some comments of encouragement might spur me along.  Also questions or suggestions for topics are appreciated)

Punting - keep it up!

Wednesday, 8 February 2012

Viagra's Ups and Downs


I have posted previously an anecdotal story of the dangers of Viagra overdose (see "Cunning Conversations - Viagra is Not for Boys" on "TheCunningLinctus.blogspot.com"),  but I now write from personal experience about "normal" use.

Firstly let me reiterate that Viagra and related Cialis are prescription medications, since there are medical conditions that contra-indicate their use (certain heart conditions).  Always have a doctor's consultation first.  These medications are prescribed for Erectile Dysfunction and if you don't suffer from ED, then their use just for the 'high' is unwise.

I was in my late 50's when I first started suffering the embarrassment of 'running out of steam' mid-stream (if you will excuse the mixed metaphors).  My doctor first tried me on one 100mg dose of Viagra with wonderfully hard results (but followed by side effects described below).  I also then realised that the hard coating made the tablet impossible to break in half.  I then tried a 50mg dose with almost as good results and less side-effects.

Considering their cost (around AU$70 for a packet of 4, and 50mg and 100mg sizes are around the same price - but do shop around since the price varies quite a bit between pharmacies) - I opted for the 100mg dose and use a craft knife/saw to cut them in half, thus effectively halving my per dose cost.  I have tried Cialis recently, but they seem to come in only one size which are a lot smaller and cannot be cut - they cost around AU$140 for a pack of 8.  There are also on-line/mail-order suppliers, but I'm suspicious.

"Ups"
The chemical's excretion rate is slower with age, so at 60 one can enjoy the effects for a good 24 hours (remember you need to take your tablet at least 30 minutes before 'required').  It's so nice to wake up the morning after with a hot hard-on - better yet if you have someone to share it with - sigh, no such luck for me.

There is a myth that you end up with a 'permanent' erection (for the duration) - this is false - you will be 'full' but flaccid until 'stimulated'.  You will be slow to come down after ejaculation (so be careful your lady-friend doesn't continue to enjoy herself and end up with a condom slippage).  You will probably also find your self ready for round 2 (or 3) sooner (decreased “refractory” period).

With Erectile Dysfunction, you may also have started losing sensitivity and take longer to come (if at all).  Viagra/Cialis does NOT help this.  So you may find that you can keep going for as long as your lady is up for it - forget the 'happy ending' and enjoy the journey.

"Downs"
Side effects are dose dependant and vary between users - some people claim Cialis has fewer side effects.

The first side-effect is flushing of the skin, particularly of the face - no big deal - but might be a 'give-away' to the wife!

Head-aches are common after 3-4 hours and doubly so with alcohol.

Intestinal gastric effects also occur, being gastric reflux (indigestion) and next day what I call "Teflon bowel".

If you have a predisposition to peripheral capillary bleeds (nose or haemorrhoids) there is a chance you might suffer a minor bleed.

Then there is the chance of condom 'accident' described above.

Summary
Absolutely the best thing ever.  It will keep me going into my 70s for as long as I can afford it (and the ladies).

Wishing you all a very Happy, Hard New Year.

Wikipedia (http://http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sildenafil) has an excellent, full write-up and lots of references for more details).

Thursday, 2 February 2012

V2 - a Hot Cougar MILF


This was the Monday of the 3rd week of January. Punters seemed to be out in force, probably feeling frisky after a sexless Christmas and New Year (such is the effect of family holidays, visiting relatives and school holidays).  The little foyer was like peak-hour at at the railway station.  Regulars A, J and V1 were already in bookings and J, G, B and V2 were intro'ing - I was relegated to the foot of the stairs.

V2 quips, "Do I want the 5 hours booking?" - I like her sense of humour.  We quickly retire upstairs (V2 has been called in especially - she normally works W-Th-F nights).  I had received a phone call concerning an urgent family situation whilst travelling up William St. but it can wait 30 minutes.

It was my first meeting with V2, but we hit-it-off straight away. V2 is of Malaysian-Chinese ancestry (with a touch of Dutch she tells me).  At a guess I would put her as over-40 with a trim, taut, terrific frame.  She is a good mature conversationalist, with a good sense of hurmour and a confident personality.

In no time, V2 is demonstrating her excellent oral skills.  She obviously likes what she is eating and asks if she can sit on me.  I suggest that for a start she sit on my face.  Well she could hardly swing her leg around quickly enough.  She is spasming in no time and I am almost drowning (she admits to being a bit of a 'squirter').

Then with a sense of urgency, she wants to feel my thickness inside her and swings a round to sit on me, but changes her mind, asking for mish position for deeper penetration.  Her vocal exhortations match her thrusting till she come to a quivering climax.  Her involuntary squeezing is replaced by incredibly good muscle control till she brings me off shortly after herself.

It has been a long time since I can remember such an intense, quick completion.  We collapse back and chat about Chinese New Year, cooking, Viagra and 2nd rounds.  I get the distinct impressions should would be ready for round #2 soon but I know I wouldn't before our 30 minutes is up.  She finishes with an average massage (she readily admits that massage is not her forte).

Probably the one thing missing was some DFK and cuddling.  It was pretty full on from the start, getting stuck straight into it.  Perhaps next time when we have got to know each other better.

With a "quickie divorce" kiss at the door, I head back to work. (The family situation proved to be a false alarm).

I have a distinct feeling that there will be an after-hours work function I will have to attend one wed, thurs of friday evening soon.  I will make sure I give ourselves more time next time.
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